There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize