I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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