No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize