Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
