I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
