i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize