Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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