whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
