fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Randomize
