normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
