I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
