I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
