no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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