Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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