my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
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