i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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