I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You made out with two different species that night
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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