just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
