you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
