goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
