Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
