Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Randomize