just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
