He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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