I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize