That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You can't special order awesome
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
