I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
