mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
