Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
