dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
