Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
