im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
