no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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