Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize
