CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
