it wasn't lemon gatorade
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Your shirt... Was in my pants
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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