would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
