She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
