If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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