I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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