Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
