I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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