And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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