Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just gift wrapped bread.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
