they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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