I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize