i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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