then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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