Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
