Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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